Thread: Funny Pictures, Sayings and Cartoons

As a singer, I sing at many funerals & I was recently asked by a funeral director to sing at a graveside service for a homeless man. He had no family or friends, so the service was to be at a Pauper's Cemetery out near Lindale. As I was not familiar with the area, I got lost. Everyone that knows me knows I can be directionally challenged AND my navigation lost its signal.
I hate Sprint!!
Anyway, I finally arrived an hour late and saw that the funeral guy had evidently gone and the hearse was nowhere in sight. There were only the diggers and crew left and they were eating lunch. I felt bad and apologized to the guys for being late. I went to the side of the grave and looked down and the vault lid was already in place. I didn't know what else to do, so I started to sing. The workers put down their lunch and began to gather around. I sang my heart and soul out for this man with no family and friends.
As I sang "Amazing Grace", the spirit began to move and the workers began to weep. They wept, I wept, we all wept together. When I finished, I prayed a benediction and started for my car, my head hung low but my heart so FULL.
As I opened the door to my car, I overheard one of the workers say, "I've seen nothin' like that before and I've been putting in septic tanks for twenty years."
Apparently, I was still lost

When a group of tourists visited a crocodile farm, the owner of the place launched a bold proposal;
- Whoever dares to jump, swim to the coast and survive, I'll give you $ 1 million.
No one dared to move, suddenly, a man jumped into the water and desperately swam to the shore while being chased by all the crocodiles.
With enormous luck came, taking everyone's admiration at the scene, then the owner announced;
- We have a brave winner.
After collecting his reward, the couple returned to the hotel, upon arrival, the manager told him; he was very brave to jump, then the man said;
- I didn't jump, someone pushed me!
His wife smiled...
Moral: ′′ Behind every successful man, there's a woman who pushes him "

Originally Posted by Nikos

As a singer, I sing at many funerals & I was recently asked by a funeral director to sing at a graveside service for a homeless man. He had no family or friends, so the service was to be at a Pauper's Cemetery out near Lindale. As I was not familiar with the area, I got lost. Everyone that knows me knows I can be directionally challenged AND my navigation lost its signal.
I hate Sprint!!
Anyway, I finally arrived an hour late and saw that the funeral guy had evidently gone and the hearse was nowhere in sight. There were only the diggers and crew left and they were eating lunch. I felt bad and apologized to the guys for being late. I went to the side of the grave and looked down and the vault lid was already in place. I didn't know what else to do, so I started to sing. The workers put down their lunch and began to gather around. I sang my heart and soul out for this man with no family and friends.
As I sang "Amazing Grace", the spirit began to move and the workers began to weep. They wept, I wept, we all wept together. When I finished, I prayed a benediction and started for my car, my head hung low but my heart so FULL.
As I opened the door to my car, I overheard one of the workers say, "I've seen nothin' like that before and I've been putting in septic tanks for twenty years."
Apparently, I was still lost

You had me going Nikos. I didn't realize what thread I was in and thought you were telling this about yourself. First thing I thought was, 'I didn't know Nikos was known as a singer". You had be going until the septic tank part and then I saw I was in the "Funny Pictures, Sayings and Cartoons" thread.

Originally Posted by GodismyJudge

Actually, I thought exactly the same thing, but I caught on a little bit earlier...

Same here. I was a little surprised after the first sentence so I kind of scanned down and realized it was a joke.