Thread: Being mad vs. not forgiving

Originally Posted by fuego

Not ultimately I don't think. Sometimes we have to forgive 'by faith', meaning we make the decision to forgive by faith, then by faith act, speak, think in ways on purpose that contradict offense (walk by faith). In other words we quit being led by those feelings and obey the Word. Eventually that will remove the offense from our heart, and the root being dead, the fruit will die, i.e., the feelings.

To make a long story short and not go into any real detail, I have a friend that was highly offended by a couple of people. Had no intention of forgiving them. One day the Spirit basically told him that you're not going to go any further in me until you do. He was honest and said he didn't want to. The Lord said 'would you be willing to be willing'? And he said yes, but I really don't want to. The Lord said to him, all I want you to do is every time you think of them, just ask me to bless them. Well he was thinking about them all the time because he was offended by them. But he obeyed by faith, and eventually his feelings began to change. They changed so much that today those two people are two of his best friends. And as he began to obey God, He was able to show him his part in the matter. He went from seeing those two as being totally wrong to the Lord being able to show him that his part in the matter was actually worse than theirs. That's how true forgiveness will change a person. We have to give God the faith He needs to change our heart. When the heart changes the feelings follow.

Oh come on now--this is you, isn't it?

Originally Posted by FaithfulOne

Oh come on now--this is you, isn't it?

Fuego's friend will forgive you for that accusation.

Originally Posted by Colonel

Fuego's friend will forgive you for that accusation.

Originally Posted by FaithfulOne

Oh come on now--this is you, isn't it?

No, I'm not speaking in Paul's "I knew a man..."

Originally Posted by fuego

No, I'm not speaking in Paul's "I knew a man..."

For context with those unfamiliar...

It is doubtless[a] not profitable for me to boast. I will come to visions and revelations of the Lord: 2 I know a man in Christ who fourteen years ago—whether in the body I do not know, or whether out of the body I do not know, God knows—such a one was caught up to the third heaven. 3 And I know such a man—whether in the body or out of the body I do not know, God knows— 4 how he was caught up into Paradise and heard inexpressible words, which it is not lawful for a man to utter. 5 Of such a one I will boast; yet of myself I will not boast, except in my infirmities. 6 For though I might desire to boast, I will not be a fool; for I will speak the truth. But I refrain, lest anyone should think of me above what he sees me to be or hears from me. 2 Corinthians 12: 1-6

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Originally Posted by Femme*

D didn't do what he needed to. He ignored my pleas to go to the dr. He kept hiding the severity of the situation from me until we nearly had thermonuclear war over it.

He had to have surgery, near lost his arm (and that's still a distinct possiblity down the line) they had to do a HUGE skin graft to cover the area (I think it was about 18x22 INCHES)

So, while I was FLAMING mad at him, I was still wrenched because of what he had to go through. I spent a good amount of time in tears going back and forth...

I was wondering if there was an update on him, you both have been in our prayers.

Originally Posted by FaithfulOne

Is there a symbiotic relationship between the two, or are they/can be separate?

Can someone truly forgive and still be mad at a person?

I believe negative emotional attachment to an experience means true healing or total forgiveness has not been achieved.

I like femme's answer..forgiveness is a decision that sometimes works out in a process...but as long as we desire punishment or vengeance we have not forgiven..

God is the best example of what He expects from us..when He forgave us He embraced us in His love. He may allow our consequences to come to fruition for our good but that is His reason, not judgment or even justice..

So I believe the negative emotions mean we are still in the process and need to talk to God more about the situation.

Dr. Leaf would advise us probably to pull up that memory and examine it allowing those negative emotions to surface and then ask Holy Spirit to speak healing to that situation.